The Hilarious Athletic Mind (or not)

19th Marathon Thoughts

With my 19th marathon at hand, the typical athletic mind takes over. Following are the many oscillating thoughts I have during the race:

At the start line ‘I’m ready!’… and the other side of my mind screams back, “ Are you sure, you said the same thing before facing Nolan Ryan when I was up a creek without…!”

Mile 5, still pumped: ‘I was born to run!’ … then I remember, ‘No, I was born when Eisenhower was president when running far wasn’t exactly cool.’

At mile 10: ‘I’ve done this before!’ … and my brain goes, ‘Yeah, but the miles are not adding up very fast, as each year I seem to get slower and slower.’

Mile 15: ‘It’s only five hours of my life!’ … then I realize, ‘That’s five hours of pain I’m PAYING for when I could be watching the Bears- wait, maybe it ‘s a draw.’

Mile 20, people cheer: ‘Enjoy the scenery!’ … and I’m like, ‘Buddy, the only scenery I want is the inside of my bedroom with Netflix asking, Are you still watching?’

And mile 23? Someone says, ‘The elites finished over two hours ago!’ … I’m like, ‘Yeah? If you say that again, I’m gonna show you elite-level punching speed.’

Finally, 26.2 - the finish line: ‘I did it!’ … and my body replies, ‘Cool. Never again and I’m not moving for three days minimum.’

Joking aside - Praying I get to say “I did it.” No guarantees in sport but grateful for the opportunity to run, and run, and run!